We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Be still, my beating vagina.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
