google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
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