i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
