trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Congratulations! We have a period
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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