please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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