Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
