he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize