1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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