Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
