Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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