i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
