My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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