If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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