Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
