I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Randomize