all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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