U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
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