how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
Randomize
