His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize
