Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize