Screwed.edu
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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