Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Randomize
