Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
