come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
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