She went from zero to smokin in five shots
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
