That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize