I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Randomize
