I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
and i looked up. we had an audience...
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
