Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Randomize
