Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
