i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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