its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
