The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Farmville is her only friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
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