they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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