He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
