I can text with my tongue
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
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