he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize