weddingsv make me drug and hornr
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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