Sorry, I don't speak sober.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
