I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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