I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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