If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize