i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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