I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize