She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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