so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize
