So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
