I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
She said her name was "party"
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
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I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
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Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
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