Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
