I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Randomize
