Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize